New Beginnings

I have been telling myself for some time now that I can't write.  I know that I can, I am physically able.  Thoughts use to flow from me freely onto paper.  Their release brought me clarity among other things.  I think the truth is that I am afraid to write.  Fearing being honest with myself.


In my life I have faced fear many times.  I have come through those situations, not unscathed, but certainly I have emerged on the other side.



A single step forward is a beginning.  Yet, taking that step has often felt impossible.  I have experienced so much in my life both good and bad.  What I have realized is that these experiences as a whole, have shaped and formed the woman I am today.  There are many things that I now wish had never happened.  So many things I wish had taken place.  There are regrets as well as triumphs.  With it all, I have come to understand one very important thing.  The experiences have helped to form this woman that I am but my reaction to them has been the brush which paints the colors of my life.

Some people say that time heals all wounds.  To me that sounds like there is a magic wand somewhere that is just going to whisk it all away.  Surviving trauma and moving into a healthier place takes work as well as time.  If I am unwilling to do the work, all the time in the world isn't going to help.  It isn't enough for me to simply survive.  I want to thrive!  There is no reason that I can not. We each have own own paths and our own notion of what thriving is.  For me thriving means that I move forward into my future with confidence.  It means that I acknowledge my past with honesty and that I live in the present with humility and compassion toward myself and others.

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