Exhaustion

Dealing with exhaustion is one of the hardest aspects of my life right now.  To be so completely drained that I almost feel totally helpless.  When I want to do something I can only do it for a few moments before exhaustion drains whatever strength I have.  I enjoy coloring very much and even this activity drains the strength in my arms.  Writing out a blog entry is the same way.  Right now I have to take it in small time periods.
The only *cure* for this exhaustion is to take the best care of my body that I can and wait out this episode.  Talk about frustrating.  Some days I just want to throw the towel in and surrender.  Not real sure what that would look like.  I have had my moments of deep self pity.  I have had the moments of wanting to end my life if this is the way it is going to be forever.  These episodes can be that bad emotionally.  There is no way of knowing when or if it will end.  The best that I can hope for is that they have always ended in the past.
It is so much easier to encourage someone else who is going through something like this, than to encourage myself.  Offering hope to someone else is easier than holding onto hope for myself.  I am too young to be so ill, so frail, so weak....